As I come closer to making some big decisions about my like, I am struck by how big the decisions are.

Normally most decisions you can change the perspective and look at how you can change your mind again. Or move decisions into smaller ones that are experiments and learn from them.

But when it comes to 24/7 slavery you come across decisions that are one way. Even a 3 month trial as a dungeon slave comes with consequences. Even if you decide to leave afterwards you have gone through an experience that changes you

Maybe part way through you realise that perhaps it is an awful mistake. Perhaps it gets too hard, and you want out. But you cannot.

There is no way out but what has been agreed.

How do you react at this point? Do you react with bitterness, with anger, with hate. Or do you want to react in a different way. One that means you take responsibility for your decisions.

It reminds me of a quote from the film: The Lion in Winter. The only reason why I know of this quote is from the West Wing series.

Here there are two characters and the one says: “You fool! As if it matters how a man falls down.” To which his companion replies: “When the fall’s all that’s left, it matters a great deal.”

And so I think about making some of these large decisions. At a certain point you need to make a decision, and you do not know what there may lead. There may be no way out.

At this point there is nothing you can do that control how you react. As when the fall that is the only thing that is left, how you fall is the only that can matter.

I hope when I reach this point I fall with my values, my principles, and in service.