I first engaged with the BDSM scene and found Masters using Recon and other now-defunct websites. Then several years later, I started to attend some BDSM bars, including the S.M. Gays event in London (perfect for beginners). Before I finally started to attend some of the larger events, such as European Folsom and Berlin Leather Easter.
One thing I found with myself was that I constantly compared myself to these fantastic, good-looking people. People that looked far better than I ever could.
And I’ve had my fill of rude, arrogant people on Recon telling me I am too fat or not muscled enough – or when I put on muscle – I am now too big.
And then, after I broke up with my last Master, I put on a lot of weight. I went from the muscled slave everyone looked at to becoming very overweight, and I felt terrible about my appearance.
But then I headed to a fetish club – a place where you had very serious people do BDSM play, and I learnt something fundamental that I want to share with you.
When it comes to the Master/slave Lifestyle and more serious BDSM – this group of people comes in all shapes and sizes. It does not matter if you are too big, too small or what ethnicity you are. It is about mutual interests.
It took me 15 years to realise this. That is 15 years of feeling bad about myself.
So if you think you do not have the right body shape to fit in. Please know that you do.
Discover the people who like your body type and the serious play you are into (or want to start experiencing), and go play.
This is true of age as well – I know of one slave who found his 24/7 Master at age 65.
So no matter how you look or your age, you can still be a Master or slave.
Do you struggle to embrace your fetishes because you worry there’s something wrong with you? Or perhaps you worry about what people will think of you? You’re not alone in thinking this, and it is often due to shame. I have written a handbook based on multiple research to help you break free from shame—check it out there.
Do you want more help figuring out what you want or how to find a Master or slave effectively? I have some online masterclasses you should check out.
If you want more help with power exchange, why not check out my book on the secrets of power exchange? I break down power exchange into four sections, helping you protect yourself from others and how to become the best Master or slave you can be.
If you want more help with these subjects, I offer coaching to help you embrace your kinks and fetishes.
And for those in the Master/slave Lifestyle – even if you use different terms – I offer coaching to help you move forward, be it you want to find a Master/slave lifestyle or you are already in a relationship and are looking for support.
Shame.
unleash yourself from shame
Coaching to those wanting to move and embrace their kinks.
Specialist coaching in the Master/slave and power exchange lifestyle.
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A book that unveils the secrets of power exchange so you can protect yourself and become the best Master or slave you can be
