True slavery is about emotions and feelings. The thought becomes secondary. With a Master you can trust, you can let go and allow Him to think for you. To allow His orders, needs and wants to drive your actions. And you become a vessel of all of your emotions, and you allow that energy to drive your service. A good Master will take this energy and craft it into the service He wants from You. When I trust a Master to give completely, I start to truly become the emotions and energy in my body and letting go of my mind. I focus everything on Him, giving to Him with all my heart, putting all my energy to carrying out His orders. Have you ever served someone (or been served by someone), and it felt incredible? Often it is because there is a connection between the two of you, and that connection is an energy. An energy that feels greater

than the sum of what the two of you are putting into the connection. Deep slavery is about the feelings and emotions you feel, and these are used to serve the Master in a deep intense connection. This connection is based on the energy of these emotions and feelings. In heavy power exchange a central part is in the connection between the Master and the slave. This is something that often happens subconsciously and with no effort between the people involved, and often people have an intuitive way of creating and channeling this energy. However, this energy and connection is something that be broken down and understood. And in that understanding you can learn to become better and more powerful at using it. It is a skill that can be learnt. In this set of articles I will detail the steps a slave can take to do this. These steps may also help a Master, but being a slave I…

,Is submission important? As a slave - obedience is something we all like to do. When we think about Master/slavery a lot of our thoughts come down to control.  Loosing control, and being controlled by the other. A Master orders. The slave obeys. But is obedience enough? Obedience Obedience can be forced upon someone. A person can obey because they have no choice to.  But is this the ultimate aim? Let’s think about a situation at work where you had no choice but to obey. Maybe it was a restructuring at work - something that was inflicted upon you. How did you feel and how did you react? Or perhaps you were the boss having to enact a change upon your employers. How did the employees act in this situation. Often people will grudgingly accept the change. They will do the least amount possible to do what is needed. But their heart is not in it. They do not really care

about it. They have no emotional attachment to it. At worse they fight against the change. So you can force someone to obey, but there is no heart. Is there a different way? But what happens if you empower people to be part of the change? To help shape it, to influence it and to be part of it? They become emotionally invested. They want to work to bring it about. Rather than putting up with the change, they become active participants in bringing it about. I work as a coach helping to transform companies and departments.  I find the most powerful way of bringing about this change is to bring people on the journey with me. To become emotionally invested, to become part in defining the change, and to be active in helping to bring it about. And all this is also true about slavery.  Submission Submission is the act of choosing to submit and obey. As mention…

I am writing this report as ordered By Master Lupus who I was honoured to serve over Folsom. I found out about Master Lupus from a good friend of mine - Master Bear. I think we had known about each other for a while, but we first met in person at Easter at a cafe. I happened to be meeting with Master Bear and Master Lupus then appeared. I waited for my moment and plucked up the courage to give him my slave business card which gives the web address for this blog. Since then we have been talking through Whats App every so often. Then at the start of Folsom I was lucky enough to meet up with Master Lupus and an Alpha friend of His for a coffee. We sat down and shared our thoughts and philosophies over Mastery, slavery, living fetish as a lifestyle and the fetish scene in general. It was an amazing chat. It can

often feel lonely looking for lifestyle in the current fetish scene - which currently is focussed more on gear and sex. To chat with two people who see and want connection, and understand the energy in domination is spiritual was amazing. For a few days i was thinking about Him and whether i should ask for the possibility of serving Him at some point over Folsom. so on Wednesday i did. To my surprise and delight He replied quickly to me saying that some time should be possible. So we met on Sunday for me to serve Him. i was very nervous to go. It would be my first time serving anyone at the new Qualgiest, and apart from a serving a very good Master this year for a week, I have not really done any training or service for around 18 months. But despite the worries and nervousness I headed onwards to Qualgiest. The first surprising thing was I…

As I come closer to making some big decisions about my like, I am struck by how big the decisions are. Normally most decisions you can change the perspective and look at how you can change your mind again. Or move decisions into smaller ones that are experiments and learn from them. But when it comes to 24/7 slavery you come across decisions that are one way. Even a 3 month trial as a dungeon slave comes with consequences. Even if you decide to leave afterwards you have gone through an experience that changes you Maybe part way through you realise that perhaps it is an awful mistake. Perhaps it gets too hard, and you want out. But you cannot. There is no way out but what has been agreed. How do you react at this point? Do you react with bitterness, with anger, with hate. Or do you want to react in a different way. One that

means you take responsibility for your decisions. It reminds me of a quote from the film: The Lion in Winter. The only reason why I know of this quote is from the West Wing series. Here there are two characters and the one says: “You fool! As if it matters how a man falls down.” To which his companion replies: “When the fall’s all that’s left, it matters a great deal.” And so I think about making some of these large decisions. At a certain point you need to make a decision, and you do not know what there may lead. There may be no way out. At this point there is nothing you can do that control how you react. As when the fall that is the only thing that is left, how you fall is the only that can matter. I hope when I reach this point I fall with my values, my principles, and in service.

When a Master/slave relationship comes to an end what does one do? A Master / slave relationship is one of deep intensity and connection, and when that ends there are significant feelings and consequences. In this article I would like to explore what that can feel like, but then a suggestion about what we as a community should do for these events. So what happens: For this article I can only talk about the feelings from a slave side as that is what I have experienced. When I’ve had my relationship with a Master finish I often go through the cliche 5 stages of grief: denial anger bargaining depression acceptance I often use a metaphor to describe how it feels. You are standing on stop of a cliff, and when the relationship ends you are pushed off it. Now what happens when someone is pushed of a cliff? They panic and try and grab hold of anything that will stop

them from falling. And perhaps for a time they do. The find a branch and hold on, but eventually it cracks and you continue your fall. You instinctively fight it, but you are trying to fight against gravity. There is no way you can win against gravity. So inevitably you fall and crash to the ground with some force. You break into pieces, and then slowly start the process of putting yourself together again. If you choose to jump - to end the relationship - it can be easier to reach the bottom. But when you have no control over it (and as a slave you often will not), this can be a scary experience. You may not even realise you are falling (denial), and do anything to stop yourself from crashing to the ground. This happened to me last year. As I have grown older, I would like to think I have grown wiser, but when I was pushed…

I started to have a fascinating conversation with someone about what do you look for in a slave or Master, which has led to this article. The easy answer You look at the profile. See that it fits your needs and wants. Look at the photos and make sure the person looks good. Then you ask them what sort of play you do. Talk about the sessions that turn you on, and from there you know you have a match… …but of course this is not true. And does not work. The above is fine if you are looking for play but of you are looking for 24/7, or a more deeper relationship, are these really the important questions? What are the useful questions? Are they a fantasist? What is the person like? What would life be like with them? Are they deranged / psychotic / dangerous Is there the x-factor between us? Is the form of slavery/

Mastery what I want? Do they have potential? Are they a fantasist? It is an unfortunate fact of life that when looking for 24/7, you will have to go through a large number of people who are fantasists and are not actually looking. How can you find out who is real and who is not? As a slave one of the affective ways I have found is by asking questions unrelated to sex. An example is: “What would a typical day be like with you Sir?” The reason why I like this is that it tries to find out if the Master has thought about a real life with a slave or just play. Sex is just a small part of living it as a lifestyle, and you want to see this reflected in the answer. It is also a question that can take a little time to answer. So when people refuse to answer it or give a generic one sentence…

22 years ago, when I was 16, i started to read the first book in a fantasy trilogy called the Assassins Apprentice. I cannot remember a book speaking to me the way this one did, and main character who I could so easily understand. (Note there will be some spoilers below) Over many years more books came back in the same fantasy world, sometimes they would come back to the same characters i had so fallen in love with. And now it is all done. 16 books and 22 years later the writer has finished their work. i was in the school library reading the end of the first trilogy, to this day i remember the last line in the book: “We dream of carving our own dragon.” In this world, through magic, certain people could carve stone into creatures and fill themselves into it, creating a sort of immortality. And today as I fly back to

Berlin, I finished the final book. At the end, this character that, at 16 years old i have so loved, finally dies so at the end of his long life, spilling his life into stone and forming a wolf (rather than a dragon). And here I sit 22 years later. More hurt, more wise, more bruised, more lived, and facing my own decisions. How much of myself do I pour into the Master? Do I give freely all that i am pouring everything into him? Or do i hold part of myself back for the world. As i face the decision of giving all myself up into slavery, a close friend remarked that in what i give and do now to help people, and in what i could do, that pouring so much of myself into slavery could be a loss for the world. . How do i live? Do i stay in this world and help others, or do i give everything…

From fantasising about slavery to successfully finding a Master to serve, there are a number of stages a person can find themselves going through. In this blog's first joint article with slave sean we try to describe these stages. Fantasise Initial Meeting(s) The Slave/Submissive Realisation Experiencing the Reality of Slavery Finding a Master Enter into a Master/slave relationship Fantasy vs. Reality – Maintaining the Master-Slave Relationship in the Face of ‘Real Life’ New Discoveries Slavery as a Normal State of Being In part 1 we detail the first 4 stages. Fantasise As with most things it starts with the fantasy. Perhaps it is something you have fantasized on your own since you were young (for me I was 3-4 years old). Or did you come across a book or website that opened this world to you (I remember finding the www.thedoghouse.org (now defunct) on the second day I had internet access and suddenly found that other people not only had the

same fantasies as me, but actually lived them!). In the fantasy stage the person fantasizes, masturbates, but never actually does anything real. I would include the many people on recon and other chat sites who never meet, but endless talk and wank on their computer. Many people can spend their entire life in this phase. In this phase some common emotions someone can experience are fear, shame, and rejection. Fear People may never move into the next phase as they are to scared to realise their fantasies. To take that next step is to much. Or perhaps it would bring about to much change to their life - perhaps they are married with a wife for example. Here I would advise to have courage. Try and focus on the reasons why you might be scared. If you can identify them, you can then talk with people about those fears and how they might be overcome. Shame and rejection Other…

In 2013 I started to talk to a Master in the USA called Master Matthew. I was terrified about speaking to someone so real, and who was looking for one of the most intense forms of slavery I’ve ever come across. At the time I had been through a traumatic experience with a Master and had emotionally closed down and had walked away from slavery. Eventually the pull of service was to much for me to ignore and I embarked on a journey to refund my slavery. Master Matthew kindly took the time to guide and help me, allowing me to realise that true service comes through emotion. Now stop and think about that for a moment. Imagine trying to explain to someone who has shut off emotions that they need to feel again. It is something that you can understand on a theoretical level but it is not something you can feel, or practically understand until you are able

to start feeling again. So over a long period of time - it could have been over a year - He patiently kept on explaining this to me. I remember at the time struggling with it. All I knew was when I tried to serve someone, something was missing, and I did not know how to get it back. But eventually I did, and my ability to serve came back stronger by understanding how important emotion is to slavery. And that was thanks to Master Matthew. I think we were both surprised that over the years we kept in touch, and slowly over time, we found a relationship forming. One where we supported each other through the hard times and celebrated through the good. He is also the only Master I have ever bough a tribute for - to thank Him for all of His help and support over the years. I remember when I first met the Master (who…

The process for me to accept I wanted 24/7, and then the courage to start looking for it, was a long one. I wish I had known how hard it actually is to find a true 24/7 Master, as I would have spent much less time procrastinating over the decision. And the search is really hard. For anyone - Master, slave, leather brother - who is seeking the other - will find many people are actually fantasists and not really looking. Then with what is left some are incredible unstable, and others dangerous. And then with those left it is like any relationship. Trying to find someone you can trust and live with - all be it in a very different way. It is a path fraught with difficulties and disappointments. So how do we counter this, how do we deal with the challenges on the path we choose. With belief. Belief in ourselves, and belief in our journey.

We often relate belief to religion, a belief in a god or gods. But I think it is wider than that. All people need to believe in something. For some it is religion, for others it is a belief to not believe in a god. For others it is in capitalism, or a certain doctrine. Some people are fanatical in that belief. This is even true of fantastical atheists who do not believe in a god. They hold onto a strong belief there is no god. As humans we all want to believe in something greater than ourselves. I think we are hard wired to need this. For me the belief I have chosen is that I am a slave, and I need a Master to serve. To put it another way: I have been put on this planet to help people. Belief is a fire I like to think of belief as a fire. A fire must be fed fuel…